An aside…

To all the GOPers talking up how they’re going to win big in 2010 and repeal the whole health care package: grow the fuck up. No, seriously, do some second grade math. Even if you could pick up a hundred-twelve seats in the House, there’s the little matter of the Senate. There aren’t 26 Democratic Senate seats open in 2010. So as long as Barack Obama is still President, nothing ain’t going nowhere, because it is not mathematically possible to get the 2/3 vote that would be needed to overturn a Presidential veto of any repeal bill.

I wish I could remember who said it, but elections have consequences. The Democratic majorities in Congress far outstrip any Republican majority during the “Contract with America” era, and Obama explicitly campaigned on doing something with health care reform. So to borrow from Merle Haggard – since the President came through the White House door and did what he said he’ll do, my advice to you is to enjoy the free Bubble-Up and eat the rainbow stew with a silver spoon underneath that sky of blue.

Nash Vegas, son, what.

ETA: Now I hear that John McCain is butt-sore: “There will be no cooperation for the rest of the year. They have poisoned the well in what they’ve done and how they’ve done it.” Wait, would this be an end to the cooperations that saw, um, no Republican votes for the health-care package? Or for the stimulus package last spring? Or are you thinking about the shattered record for filibusters, which is shattering a record set by the GOP in the last Congress?

Can U solve the puzzle?

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Now What?

Anybody who says they know how this thing is going to play out is unbelievably full of shit. Seven months is a long time in politics – seven months ago, we were just coming off the August recess and the meme was taking hold that a passel of sign-wavers with guns were somehow representative of “real America.” I don’t think anybody anticipated that things would go down the way they have.

So after a year of wrangling, we have a bill that’s more or less along the lines of the Nixon proposal from 1974 – which Democrats, egged on by unions, turned down in the expectation they could get something better after the elections. Of course, the denouement of Watergate and the Ford interregnum (Whip Inflation Now!) pretty much put things on turbo-puree to the point where nothing ever moved again on large-scale health reform – sure, there was COBRA and cat-health and some nibbling around the edges, but it didn’t come up again until the Clinton effort in 1994. Which failed pretty spectacularly, putting things on hold for another sixteen years. Looking back at the health program Roosevelt ran on in 1912, or the health package cut from Social Security at the last minute in 1935, one gets the general impression that you can only do something really big every fifteen to twenty years, and you might not get it. Medicare wasn’t exactly a landslide, and the party that then decried it as a slippery slope to socialism is the same party now campaigning against Obama’s bill because it might threaten Medicare.

David Frum nails a lot of this in his own blog. In the absence of any other leadership following the 2006 and 2008 meltdown of the GOP, Republicans have essentially turned to their noise machine to lead them. The flaw in this, of course, is that the needs of talking-head blowhards are substantially at odds with the needs of a practicing party-in-government. Which means that instead of negotiating to drag the bill in a better direction, the Republicans in Congress were bound to a strategy of scorched earth. And the more the rhetoric ramped up, with its socialism and death panels, the more they were locked in – as Frum said, “How do you negotiate with somebody who wants to murder your grandmother? Or – more exactly – with somebody whom your voters have been persuaded to believe wants to murder their grandmother?”

Right now, I daresay that the vast majority of people wailing about their defeat – or crowing about their victory – have absolutely no idea what’s actually in this package. Which is not surprising – most of the last three months’ worth of screaming has been about various aspects of Congressional rules and process that are like Etruscan calculus to people whose civics education ended with “I’m Just A Bill.” But the general outline is pretty logical, so try to keep up:

* All insurance relies on more people buying it than using it. The larger the pool of insured people, the cheaper the overall cost to the insurer.

* Insurance presents a paradox, in that insurers make a profit by NOT providing the goods or services for which they charge.

* Therefore, insurers have every incentive to find all possible means of not providing those goods and services. In the health insurance field, this generally revolves around exclusions for “pre-existing conditions” – which have in the past included the likes of pregnancy or domestic abuse.

* Insurance companies, therefore, require a non-market force (i.e. the government) to ensure (ha!) that they will deliver goods and services for which they are paid.

* However, requiring insurance companies to cover everyone no matter what creates a perverse incentive; i.e. nobody buys insurance until they become sick, which destroys the large pool of insured people we mentioned above.

* Consequently, if you’re going to insist that everyone have coverage, you’ve got to make sure they get coverage. In a genuinely government-run system, this would take the form of single-payer insurance. To wit: everyone gets insurance, and pays the government for it via taxes. In a non-single-payer system, this means you are obligated to obtain insurance from somewhere.

* If you have a job with health insurance now, that’s where you’ll get your insurance. If you have Medicare, that’s where you’ll get your insurance. If you are not getting your insurance that way, and you’re not sponging off your folks, you now have to buy some insurance. This is butt-expensive in most cases, because of all that business about pre-existing conditions and the size of the pool.

* So the next step is to maximize the buying power of these folks. This is accomplished through the “health exchanges”, which is a fancy term for “making a big pool.”

* For insurance companies, this big pool represents a whole bunch of potential new customers.

* For said customers, this pool gives them the same purchasing power as a big corporation has; they have more programs to choose from and said programs will probably cost less than if they were out on their own, thanks to the negotiating power and economy of scale that comes from a large pool.

These three things – a coverage mandate for insurers, a purchase mandate for the insured, and a mechanism for maximizing the market interaction between the two – are at the core of the reform effort. It’s the same thing that passed a few years ago in Massachusetts under that wild liberal Mormon, Mitt Romney (and Multiple Choice Mitt is running like hell from it with the Invisible Primary only months away). It’s also damn near the only way to get at universal individual coverage without actual government-provided insurance.

Now, there are other things that can come into play here – for instance, selling insurance across state lines. But when this happened with credit cards, all the providers moved to the states with the least restrictive regulations, which is why your credits cards all come from Delaware or North Dakota and charge you ricockulous interest. I suppose you could sell across state lines if you had some overarching federal regulation, but I’m not sure how much of that is in the current package. There’s also the notion of a “public option” – allowing people to chose Medicare or some other government-provided insurance as one of the competitors in the exchange. A lot of people considered such an option to be necessary to put real cost-control pressure on insurers. A lot more considered it to be the camel’s nose under the tent for an actual government-run single-payer system. Whether this is a good or a bad thing largely depends on whether you are a teabagger or a dirty fucking hippie.

Notice that most of what I’ve said has been about availability. Actual cost is another barrel of bourbon altogether. The big expenses in this scheme mostly revolve around providing subsidies to people who are now obligated to buy insurance, which more or less boils down to an expansion of Medicaid. The funding mechanism seems to be a general tax hike on some folks who can probably afford it (especially after twelve years of the Bush II tax relief) and, more controversially, a tax on certain big-ticket health plans which heretofore have not been treated as income (much to the chagrin of unions who negotiated such packages in lieu of pay hikes). But even this is more about the cost of the insurance, rather than the cost of the actual care.

I think the thing most people are counting on is that if everyone has insurance, they will actually go see the doctor before things get to the point where they wind up being wheeled into the emergency room with an exploded ventricle. It’s a hell of a lot cheaper to tell somebody their cholesterol is 224, outline how to change their diet, and maybe prescribe some statins or something, if the alternative is to do nothing and then try for a balloon angioplasty and triple-bypass fifteen years down the line (with corresponding inflation to match). This is probably why you see a lot of talk about “bending the curve” rather than “slashing costs,” especially since one of the biggest cost-reducing moves would be to just sign everyone up for Medicare and do away with all the redundancy and administrative overhead of a hundred different insurance companies.

But that’s the course we’ve taken: a plan that was literally Nixonian thirty-six years ago is now at the left edge of what can get through Congress. Which in itself is a remarkable thought, especially since the current opposition to the Obama health care reforms stems almost entirely from the Nixon-era “Southern Strategy”. It’s not the least coincidence that the opposition comes freighted with racial code-words (if not outright epithets*) and the language of violent rebellion; the Tea Party movement is the last gasp of the same forces that propelled everyone from Tom Watson and Cotton Tom Heflin to George Wallace and Orval Faubus. The same South that was a third faction, passed to Democrats in 1876 and on to Republicans in the 1960s, is now the Republican party in name and practice – and they bet everything on stopping Obama. The actual content of the plan was never relevant; all that matters is that Obama has to lose. Like I said, nobody knows what the next seven months will bring – but if the Republicans fail to capture at least one house of Congress in November, they will have to think long and hard about the fruits of being the party of the Confederacy.

* The word is “epithet,” meaning “an adjective or descriptive phrase expressing a quality characteristic of the person or thing mentioned; such a word or phrase as a term of abuse.” The word is not “epitaph.” But then, I woudn’t expect mental defectives** like Karl Rove or Michael Steele to grasp the difference.

** That was an epithet. Learn, morons.

The Plan

In retrospect, you can see what Team Obama was hoping for – having gone to school on the failure of the Clinton healthcare effort, their first goal was to get full Congressional buy-in, mostly by staffing out the bill to them. Once the House and Senate had passed something, Obama would play his hand based on what looked most viable in the conference report.

They can’t have expected anything but what they got from the GOP. Once Jim DeMint tipped his hand with the remarks about how they intended for health care to be “Obama’s Waterloo,” anybody with a brain in their skull should have expected scorched earth. I don’t think they expected to get to the August recess without a bill, which made matters much worse. They certainly didn’t plan on Ted Kennedy dying, or the circus that followed for months. Democrats lack anything remotely like the party discipline of the GOP, and all the proof needed is in the Senate. For all the talk about the two women in Maine, they were right there with their party when the final votes were taken. Meanwhile, the Democrats’ own “mavericks” had to be bought off – although, fortunately, the nature of those favors make them easy to erase in a budget reconciliation process.

There are plenty of DFHs* who would have liked to see more – a public option and Medicare buy-in at the least, a full-fledged single-payer system at best – but all the clamor for using reconciliation to blast through a 51-49 bill in the Senate overlooks the fact that the House wasn’t going to deliver anything like it. In fact, the only way the bill got through the first time was with a pile of extra abortion-related folderol that brought on a bunch of Democratic pro-lifers, which suggests that an actual government-funded plan would have been no easier to push through.

The GOP was probably out of their minds to think that they could ride this to an overthrow – anything is possible in the House, certainly, but to pick up 40 seats when they have more retiring members than the Democrats is probably optimistic. Certainly turning over 9 more seats in the Senate is asking too much, in all likelihood – and the Democrats, if they can’t have a filibuster-proof majority, would probably be as happy with 53 reliable votes as 59 where they have to look over their shoulder to see what a Nelson or a Lieberman or a Lincoln is playing at. The GOP also neglected to consider something David Frum points out – that in 1994, the Democratic president had been elected with 43% of the vote AND there was ample fertile ground for the GOP to take since the South had not completed its partisan realignment. Long story short: the GOP may well try to run against this bill in November, but as people get more of a sense of what actually happened, they may not response to promises to restore things like the Medicare Part D “donut hole” and coverage denial for children with pre-existing conditions.

In the meantime, Nancy Pelosi has to go to the front of the line for top-seed Speakers of the House – she delivered what the likes of Sam Rayburn, Carl Albert, and Tip O’Neill never could. Gingrich still stands in front for philosophical implications, but Nancy wins on results delivered.

* Dirty Fucking Hippies – not the ones selling weed out on Telegraph Ave, though they are most assuredly dirty. These are the opposite number of the Teabaggers – the ones who are still fighting Nixon and COINTELPRO, the ones who talk about “self-appointed experts from the military-industrial corporate-lock-down security complex” when you’re just trying to run an OS update on their workstations. The ones who thought that Obama was going to bring about the Age of Aquarius – in stark contrast to anything about the man that was borne out by, you know, evidence. The difference between them and the Teabaggers is that the Teabagger types always come home to the GOP in the end. The DFHs just go off to Boulder and Austin and Santa Cruz and sulk.

El Foldo

59% free throw shooting isn’t going to get you through the 2A high school regionals in Alabama, never mind the NCAA tournament. Vanderbilt failed to create a lot of opportunities – only 6, SIX, offensive rebounds – and then failed to capitalize on the ones they got. They left 12 free throws missed. Make one, and you get overtime, probably. Make two, and they’re putting up a desperate heave from 3. Make three lousy free throws – you know, the ones you get to take standing still, with nobody covering you – and it’s a different ballgame.

I don’t know whose fault it is – maybe it’s the players, maybe the coaches, maybe nobody’s fault – but this team was tight. They were strung tight as a drum, and it showed the whole game. They were playing not to lose. They played like a team terrified that all those predictions, from Yahoo to ESPN to the White House, were at risk of coming true – the ones that said Vandy was the automatic upset in round one, a sure thing for a bracket buster.

Next year will be tough. Everyone is back except Jermaine Beal, and you can’t replace a senior-leader point guard so easily. Also, having everyone back means that AJ Ogilvy is back – and he can’t decide whether he wants to be an All-American or the prettiest hipster in the West End. If I got the sense that he cared even a little bit about basketball, I’d feel a lot better about 2011.

And make no mistake, next year is for the whole shootin’ match. Tennessee is losing a shit-pile of manpower, and Kentucky is unlikely to keep Cousins AND Wall – and who knows, the NCAA may already be catching up with Calipari depending on what you hear and who you believe. You can’t count on John Jenkins wanting to stick around with the kind of money that will be on offer, and you couldn’t blame him for taking it. So this is it: the year’s over, and barring a sudden collapse, Vanderbilt will be the overrated team of the tournament. How the players react to that will determine what kind of Commodore team rolls out of the garage next November.

As an aside, this is the fourth team from Nashville I’ve seen play at HP Pavilion in person. They are a collective 0-4. Not only am I never setting foot in the Tank again, I hope a fuckin’ meteor levels it.

By the way, re: Nexus One…

Much is being made of a Flurry Analytics report showing that while the iPhone sold a million units in the first 74 days – and the Droid OVER a million – the Nexus One sold a slick 135,000. Flurry puts this down to the fact that Apple had a game-changer, and Droid had Verizon plus a holiday season – and that launching an unsubsidized phone in January may not have been the best move.

I concur entirely with this, with the extra caveat that you need to see the phone. The only way you see a Nexus One is if you know somebody with one; otherwise you buy a pig in a poke and hope for the best. In addition, this is America – which means subsidized phones, through the carrier. Apple tried to break through and didn’t; the Nexus One is doing much the same (even with a partial T-Mobile subsidy for some units).

Furthermore, and importantly: iPhone and Droid were supported by major carriers at launch. Having a Nexus One on AT&T and Verizon will go a long way toward improving those numbers. I wonder if the deal with Verizon is being impeded, though, by both the Droid and by the relative difficulty of buying your own phone and putting it on CDMA (relative to the ease of buying an unlocked GSM phone and popping in the SIM).

God wants me broke.

Birthday money gone on a netbook, property tax due, unexpected purchase of NCAA tickets, and now…Google drops a Nexus One with AT&T frequencies.

That’s just cruel.

So here, in no particular order, is a rundown of my thoughts:

* It’s completely unlocked. And costs about what I paid for a similarly unlocked SonyEricsson P800 back in 2003 in a shady Chinese cellphone shop in the Bowery, which ought to be a cautionary tale as I sold that joint within a year for a quarter of what I paid for it.

* It’s got a lot of stuff I want. 5 MP camera with flash (!) and video capture, noise-cancellation built in, high-res display, and most of all that blinding-fast processor. Not to mention integration with Google Voice *and* the Navigator function of Google Maps, which would make an end to ever needing a GPS.

* It’s got some glitches. The video camera only gets 20fps, the OLED screen actually has a less rich color palette and is supposedly almost useless in bright sun, the virtual keyboard is awkwardly placed in horizontal orientation (leading to trouble with space bar vs silkscreened buttons), the camera doesn’t have touch-to-focus and doesn’t take the best shots for a 5MP job, and the text-to-speech options are supposedly limited to certain fields.

* The geekery factor is a lot higher with the Nexus One. Multitasking, widgets, the ability to do much more granular monitoring of resources (i.e. find out what’s killing my battery!) and to sideload apps at random in addition to the goods of an unlimited Marketplace…lots of lots of LOTS of potential there.

* But the fit and polish isn’t quite there relative to the iPhone – again, it’s like Ubuntu vs Mac OS X, and how much are you willing to trade away for interface consistency and fit-and-finish. Plus I would want the stuff I’m used to – Facebook app, Tweetie, DirecTV programming, March Madness On Demand, top-notch RSS reader, Kindle app, Caltrain schedule, the $ILLY sleep-cycle alarm clock…don’t know how much of that is there yet.

* And it’s tough to tell – everything with the Android devices, you do THROUGH THE PHONE. There’s no web version of the Android Marketplace, there’s no sync to the PC – you sync everything in the clouuuuuud. Which brings us back to the “GOOGLE PWNS JOO” problem – exactly how much of your life are you willing to hand over to these guys?

Long story short (TOO LATE), I think this is the deal: we now have the leader in the clubhouse. Apple has until September to produce a compelling fourth-wave iPhone that will keep me in the barn, with the additional caveat that an unlocked Nexus One would prevent my having to do anything contract-wise. In fact, the Nexus One would let me do away with the personal plan altogether and go over to a work account, with work-paid 4G, and switch between them at random if I liked…

Hmmmmmmmm….

Your move, Cupertino. Better make it good.

Bracketology ’10

* The consensus for Vanderbilt was “hope for 4, expect 5, be prepared for 6.” When the 4 came through again, it was cause for ecstasy – as they will be playing in San Jose. Tickets have been ordered. Did we deserve a 4? Probably not, and it’s making a lot of people remember 2008, when our 4 seed went up in flames in a first-round loss to 13th-seed Siena. But I can live with that, as long as we get past the first round. Since this team is MUCH deeper than two years ago, I’m counting on everyone to show up.

* Dick Vitale asserts that this is the weakest at-large field in years, and I don’t disagree. The only team he had a beef for was Virginia Tech – and while a Wake team they swept got in ahead of them, you have to dock points for an out-of-conference rating below 300. As it is, eight mid-major teams got at-large berths, double the number from last year – and a good thing too, as there are plenty of mid-majors whose number-2 team would pound, say, the SEC’s number-5…or the Pac-10’s number-3.

* Honestly, there are only three number-1 seeds, and only two of those are absolutely legit: Kansas and Kentucky, and probably Syracuse. Duke got the fourth thanks to the usual blowjob from the NCAA, who also gave them the play-in as their first opponent and gift-wrapped a glide path through the regional. I fully expect them to fall before the Final Four; they won’t make it past Villanova if the Wildcats are there.

* The Big East is the best basketball conference in America. As ghastly as they are in football, they are THE basketball league; eight of their sixteen teams made the Big Dance and I don’t quibble with any of them. Meanwhile, the Pac-10’s two teams are the fewest from a power conference since 1988, and I don’t expect either of them to survive the first round (sorry, sweetie) – in fact, if Cal had won the Pac-10 tournament I am convinced they would have been the lone rep from the conference. I don’t think that’s happened since the days when only conference champs made the tournament. The SEC got four in, which is one more than it deserved; Mississippi State may have a beef that Florida got in and they didn’t, but Florida doesn’t deserve to be there either. No SEC West team made it, and for good reason; they were DREADFUL. Not one team in the SEC West won a regular season matchup against any of the 4 East teams who made the dance.

* All this adds up to this: the NCAA is getting top-heavy in basketball. There’s about 20 contenders, there are a whole lot of mid-mediocre teams, and there’s a whole lot of dreck. All I can think about is how two years ago, all four #1 seeds made the Final Four, and a 4-seeded Vandy team ranked in the top 20 at the end of the regular season managed to lose an opening-round game by 21 points to a 13 seed. Memo to these ‘Dores: you can be forgiven for losing, but you will never be forgiven for quitting.

* Friends represented (partial list): Vanderbilt, California, Notre Dame, Syracuse, Ohio State, North Texas, UC-Santa Barbara, Minnesota, Washington, Georgia Tech, West Virginia, Villanova, St Mary’s, Michigan State, San Diego State, Kansas, and I *know* I’m forgetting somebody…but seriously, is there a better annual sporting event in the world? I don’t think so, y’all. You can keep your Super Bowls and your World Series and your Stanley Cups…nothing’s as great as three weeks in March.

Shameless or clueless?

Look, I’ll be the first to admit I’m not the world’s greatest Christian. You know how the Baptists talk about “backsliding”? I backslide like I was on the monster waterslide at King’s Dominion. He that is without sin, etc etc.

But Glenn Beck’s got a lot of damn gall to talk about “perversion of the gospel” when he threw in his lot with the Magic Underwear crowd. I mean, I liked the original Battlestar Galactica as much as the next guy, but I’m gonna put “social justice” in my Gospel, you put “Kolob” (sic) in yours, and let’s see who the Christians think is closer to the right track, dickbag.

Seriously, how long do we have to pretend wacky morning-show shit deserves to be treated as actual worthwhile political discourse?

EDITED TO ADD: Catechism of the Catholic Church, part three: Life in Christ. Section one, chapter two, Article Three: Social Justice. Right up top. One billion people, son. In fact, now that you mention it, yonder’s some Mormons. Your move, carnival freak.